When you dedicate a month to journey across the country in an RV without much of a plan other than to visit a few friends and some national parks along the way, you embark upon an adventure of exploration bound only by one’s creativity.
After 11730 Kilometers, 11 states, 8 national parks, over 27 days, here are 5 things I’ve learned and currently most resonate with from my trip. Who knows, these 5 could change a month from now, or a year from now, but they are helping me summate the learnings and takeaways at this moment of transition back home in Toronto, and will guide me through my integration process.
I hope in some way, that these personal reflections touch your heart, inspire your spirit, and head tilt your mind with curiosity and intrigue.
If you haven’t already, check out my play by play recount of my RV Trip via this Polarsteps Link
After summiting the Guadeloupe Mountain in Texas (the highest in the state) and visiting the Carlsbad Caverns, we decided to dry dock (no electrical or water hookup) in a BLM (Bureau of Land Management) free camp site in the middle of the desert. As arid, eerie, and lonely as it was, remote places like this were the far reaches of the planet I will never forget and continue seeking in my future travels. It brings solace, peace, and an interbeing with everything around you, a rare feeling I will cherish forever. (This is one of my favourite photos of the trip, taken by my co-pilot Jason, dear friend and uni roomate).
1
Only when the eyes are closed is when you can truly see.
As ironic as this phrase is, it is in the moments of stillness and rest with eyes closed that I was able to see most clearly. Seeing the intangibles, the read-between-the lines of nature, and the deeper messages. The snowglobe analogy works well here: for example, when exploring and adventuring the breathtaking landscapes, the snowglobe is in full shake up mode; snowflakes raid the air and nothing is visible, but when still and in solitude, the snowglobe’s special features become clearly visible. And thus is life.
Takeaway: By taking the time to quiet down, close the eyes, and ground (and let the snowflakes settle), we give space to conceive the perceived, and integrate the learnings. This is how experience becomes wisdom.
2
Action isn’t just the effect of motivation; it’s also the cause of it.
To break out of a cycle of stuckness, trapped, or neverending, the key is to do something, ANYTHING! Any action beyond the norm is helpful, it’s a step in another direction, which is critical to constructive change.
My RV road trip across America was a counter to the long stay-put trip in Costa Rica. The Costa Rica plan to birth a second life hadn’t gone the way I intended, and put me in a place of limbo. I felt stuck, trying to make things work, but eventually conceded to things beyond my control. My heart was heavy, my morale was low, and I needed a new spark of motivation.
As I look back, it was both the mending of my heart and the bucket list mission that motivated me. One was cradling me out of pain, and the other was distracting me with another purpose. Every tear I cried, every meditation I sat through, every kilometer I ran, every state I drove across, brought me further away from the stuckness, and closer towards clarity.
Takeaway: action is fueled multi-directionally. We are motivated by the intrinsic and extrinsic, the past and the future, the chasing of the highs and being chased by the lows, and often, they interchange.
3
When any result is regarded as progress, we propel ourselves ahead.
Numerous times on the RV trip, I had to stop, take stock, re-evaluate, break, spend unnecessary money, shift course, back track, reset, argue, get mad, beat myself up, etc.
Moments like these are healthy and necessary. In the heat of the moments, they suck, but looking back, the perceived ‘failures’ were learning opportunities. The photo is of me climbing up a sand dune mountain, in torrential wind, feeling the summation of all of the above shittiness of ‘newbie to RV life’, and forcing myself to face it and keep climbing. I could have stopped and sledded down, but I purposely (glutton for punishment/enlightenment) wanted to further embody the uncomfortables of the trip thus far. This was my own meditation, my own practice in transmuting negative energy into productive/constructive self-growth.
Takeaway: The ability to shift attitude, perspective, and language from a failure into an opportunity is a skill, one that requires practice. I chose epic activities in nature (e.g. climbing and sledding the Great Sand Dunes National Park … way better than a gym) as one of my outlets/laboratories for growth and development.
4
The sweet ain’t as sweet without the sour.
Pictured here are Kent (friend from Costa Rica), his daughter Anna, and my buddy Jason, and doggy Mepe, getting ready to ascend and summit Bald Mountain near Breckenridge, Colorado.
Due to the unknown conditions of early mountainous springtime, we weren’t sure whether it was going to be warm or cold, windy or calm, easy or hard, and dry/muddy/or snowy terrain. We didn’t even know if the route would be visible. These unknowns made it hard to prep for, so while on the trek, the unknowns made the temperature drop extra challenging, the wind extra painful, the snow extra uncomfortable, the duration extra arduous, and the overall experience extra tough.
Most would mentally crumble under the uncertainty, but our group forged through with a get’ur’done attitude. I was super impressed by Anna, aged 16, and her stoicism, clearly passed down from Kent, and her humility in stopping and pausing at just the right moments, giving us competitive guys the reprieve from our egos.
This summit became my favourite conquest of the RV Trip. Not because I physically conquered the mountain, but because of all the mind games I mentally conquered throughout the journey.
Takeaway: The ups wouldn’t give you the high vibes without the lows. The light wouldn’t exist without the contrasting dark. The yin wouldn’t have purpose without the yang. The dualities of life help us navigate where we are on the path. They refine our inner compass so that future endeavors are empowered with that much more intelligence and wisdom.
5
True friendship is when people know everything about you but love you anyway.
Huge shout outs and gratitude go out to Monique and Ryan, friends from my Permaculture Design Certification course in Costa Rica 2021. They lent me their baby ‘Whitey’ the RV on a whim, with a random, short-timeframe request, with the trust built up from only 2-weeks of knowing each other at the course, more than a year ago! This goes to show you that counter to the title quote, even if friends don’t know much about you, they can feel you, and sense something about you that’s beyond explanation, and love you anyway. I think they’re just Jedi’s, and said to each other, ‘the force is strong with this one’, and went with it.
Big ups to my long time friends Jason and Natalie for accompanying me on the crazy epic journey across America. Jason joined me for the first leg of the trip from Florida to Colorado to Nevada, and Natalie joined on the way back from Texas to Florida. As close friends, it’s not unexpected for us to put it all out on the table and emo-vomit our troubles to each other. What was next level about it though was our ability to spill our guts and work together to accomplish the roadtrip mission. It was talk and action; where our words spoke loud, but our actions as teammates amplified our vulnerable words to each other in the most meaningful way.
Takeaway: I realized how deep, broad, multi-functional, and adaptable friendships can be with Monique, Ryan, Natalie, and Jason. That dimension of friendship wouldn’t have peaked through without a shared mission, and a shared dedication to truth, trust, and vulnerability.
BONUS!
Jason and I created a shared Spotify playlist that houses our favourite songs from the trip. The songs that represented special moments, highlights, and brought to life our togetherness. If curious and intrigued with this crazy cool adventure, dive in a little deeper with our RV Trip Album by clicking the button below.